I know I'm not supposed to pick him up, but ...

... he is so cute. And he smells so good! May I keep him, Daddy?

How many eyes does it take to make a face?

Here's looking at you, kid. I don't remember why I googled "scallop" after ordering my sushi tonight, but I was shocked when I learned that scallops have eyes. Not the regular two or four or even eight - they have 60 eyes! Augsburg College shows some nice pictures here: www.augsburg.edu/home/biology/photoofmonth/scallop-eyes.html. So... I'm wondering: If you don't eat anything with a face - would you eat scallops? How many eyes does it take to make a face? And how many are too many?

Honestly, dear raspberry ...

I don't want to be discouraging, but... don't you think September is a little late to start blossoming?

No nibbling, Earl!

And then Mr Hopper took her to a concert.

And then St. George changed his mind and started tickling the dragon.

And they lived happily ever after.

What would Pippi Longstocking do?

In times when you don't have all the answers, the right question can give you a surprisingly helpful new perspective. This one seems to work pretty well for me.

New mystery series on Karamellgewitter: What happened here?

I found this little crime scene one block down the street and it inspired me to start a new series. There are so many weird things out there! And people too... What do you think happened here? Did a giant fox have an allergic reaction to nicotine and shed his fur? Or is it an ancient Viking shaving spot? Everybody is invited to make suggestions!

Hot news on sandalism: Crime rate rises as temperatures soar, police say.

Local residents claim noise-induced hearing loss due to planting of vuvuzela tree.

What started out as a clever marketing idea to promote the arboretum at Hamburg "Planten un Blomen" park, now has resulted in a heated debate on flowers and football. 5 local residents claim they suffered hearing loss from exposure to the noise of a newly planted vuvuzela tree in the park. Despite the obvious damage, park management disclaims liability: "The tree is actually pretty quiet most of the time. It only hoots when Germany scores a goal at the world cup, which only happened four times in the first game against Australia."

And this is why I love where I live.

Always new people moving in!

Goldberg Variations vs Friday Night City Noise: 0-1.

When Ms Mangrove finally decided to get a manicure, I was more than happy to help.

Sympathy for Eyjafjallajökull: Think twice before you call me an ashhole.

Before you start cursing Eyjafjallajökull for completely messing up your vacation plans, try to see it this way: This poor guy had a very hard life until now. Since he was a baby volcano, he has always held his feelings back. But at some point of their lives most people feel that shutting down doesn't work for them anymore, and that's when they start looking for an escape from their loneliness and detachment. So did Eyjafjallajökull, who is now releasing energy from suppressed emotions and cleaning the garbage out of his life. We should really support him in letting go of fear, anger and frustration and moving forward with his life. Good job, Eyjafjallajökull!

The very best of erectile poetry: "Wednesday herd Kentucky".

I like spam when it comes with poetry. Thanks for your email, Dr. Anette Schwarz. Keep sending me cool stuff, please. It's so inspiring.

Wednesday herd Kentucky,

salary Mauritius redesigned

turned Nine Marines

retire.