Sympathy for Eyjafjallajökull: Think twice before you call me an ashhole.

Before you start cursing Eyjafjallajökull for completely messing up your vacation plans, try to see it this way: This poor guy had a very hard life until now. Since he was a baby volcano, he has always held his feelings back. But at some point of their lives most people feel that shutting down doesn't work for them anymore, and that's when they start looking for an escape from their loneliness and detachment. So did Eyjafjallajökull, who is now releasing energy from suppressed emotions and cleaning the garbage out of his life. We should really support him in letting go of fear, anger and frustration and moving forward with his life. Good job, Eyjafjallajökull!

The very best of erectile poetry: "Wednesday herd Kentucky".

I like spam when it comes with poetry. Thanks for your email, Dr. Anette Schwarz. Keep sending me cool stuff, please. It's so inspiring.

Wednesday herd Kentucky,

salary Mauritius redesigned

turned Nine Marines

retire.

For some strange reason the skinny little bird felt attracted to humans.

And although her feathers were dishelveled and she never sang, ...

... the family seemed to like her. And they fed her seeds and cheese ...

... and meatballs, and that's how she survived the long winter.